Proof that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into his father’s business.
2. He lived at home until the age of 33.
3. He was sure his mother was a virgin, and his mother was sure he was God.
Proof that Jesus was Irish:
1. He never got married.
2. He was always telling stories.
3. He loved green pastures.
Proof that Jesus was Puerto Rican:
1. His first name was Jesus.
2. He was bilingual.
3. He was harassed by the authorities.
Proof that Jesus was Italian:
1. He talked with his hands.
2. He had wine with every meal.
3. He worked in the building trade.
Proof that Jesus was Black:
1. He called everybody “brother.”
2. He liked gospel.
3. He couldn’t get a fair trial.
Jesus Is Watching You
Late one night, a burglar broke into a house that he thought was empty. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say; “Jesus is watching you.”
Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again. “Jesus is watching you,” the voice boomed again.
The burglar stopped dead in his tracks. He was frightened. Frantically, he looked all around the room. In a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot. He asked the parrot: “Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?”
“Yes,” Said the parrot.
“That is a dumb name for a parrot,” sneered the burglar. “What idiot named you Clarence?”Share